Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Deep Thoughts

It's funny what happens when you decide to make a major change in your life. Suddenly, I find myself overwhelmed with ideas of what I want to be when I grow up and I have no idea where to begin. Do I want to work in advertising, where creativity is dictated by clients in suits? Do I want to work for a heartwarming non-profit but struggle to pay bills? Do I start over as a junior designer with a company that I can actually learn from? Do I want to go back to school?

Last year around this time I applied for, and was granted admission to, the MBA program at Marylhurst. I decided not to attend at that time because I wasn't sure I'd have the energy to work full-time at -OMITTED- and take graduate level classes. Now I'm wondering if maybe I should go for it. Start full-time graduate studies and work a part-time job, subsidizing my finances with more student loans. At this rate, I'll still be paying them off when I'm 87 anyway. I'll be dead by the time I even hit the principle balance, so who cares?

I love to learn. I've never been happier than when I am in school. I even enjoyed the accounting class I took a few years ago - not because the subject is super exciting, but because I actually enjoy using my brain. Go figure. But, do I really need an MBA? Is that really the route I should take? Or am I just thinking about it because I'm terrified that I don't have the chops to make it outside The Berm? Things to ponder...

In other news, I'm on week 3 of my diet and I'm down 9.5 lbs and one dress size. Even my smaller jeans are starting to get loose. I'm hoping when I weigh in this week I'll have exceeded the 10 lb mark... and that by the time my big, fat 30th birthday shows up next month I'll be able to buy a dress of the rack. And not in the "I'm heavy, so I want to wear a muu-muu" section. Who are these designers? Do you really think large, flowing robes of flower patterned cloth is all a fat person deserves to wear?

Also, I'm developing a bit of a crush on Michael Phelps. I'm just in awe of anyone that can be that dedicated to anything. And that good. Then again, maybe it's just the swimsuit.


Anonymous said...

GO FOR IT! That's all I can say. When you were here last year you were sooooooo freakin excited about the idea of going to school. If you cna do it...do it now. don't pass it up! What about being a teacher of some sort? Seriously though...when you close your es at night..what would oube the happiest doing? and if it's school...do it kid. I believe in you..and so do a ton of other people!

And on a side note...i was wondering how long it would take you to develop this crush! ha!

Love ya!

sara lou and stew said...

I agree with Nan! In your quietest moment, when you think back to what you loved doing as child, what brings you joy...find a way to make that your job, even if your job is going to school! :)

Don't worry about making it outside the berm, I feel like if you can make it in the berm you can make it anywhere. Nike is one of the most competitive workplaces around, and you were successful there, so you can be successful anywhere. It's like NY, but with worse pizza. :)

sara lou and stew said...

with regard to M Phelps... I just read this and couldn't believe it!


Stew Scott-Curran